“Love does not boast; it is not arrogant or rude.”

1 Corinthians 13:4-5

If I could sum up these three interrelated concepts that Paul addresses in his admonition to the church in Corinth, it’s simply this: don’t use.

Love is not an emotional drug. Love is not here to make you high. Love is not something that exists for your own selfish pleasure. Love does not use people, treating them like means to an end. Love does not seek its own glory. Love is not a vehicle for getting whatever you want out of life. Love is the very antithesis of narcissism.

Something has been bothering me a lot lately, and it just came to mind as I was writing this entry. The value of true love in our modern pop culture (and I’m speaking of romantic love in particular) has become greatly diminished, and that is truly a tragedy. Please, I don’t want to sound self-righteous when I say this, but it saddens me when I hear folks make cynical remarks and excuses for the institutional failure of marriage. When we hear about the rise of teen sex, or the skyrocketing divorce rate (even in the Church, which is deeply troubling), or the moral failure of so many leaders (even in the Church, which is deeply trou…um, yeah…), the response from a large segment of the population is just a sort of cop-out, like “well, that’s just the way it is. No getting around hormones. Our grandparents probably did all that too — they just didn’t talk about it. It’s only fundamentalist hypocrites who are making a big stink, and they’re off fooling around as much as anybody.”

How did we get here? Why are people so ready to make excuses? Now I want to make something very clear: following the ways of true love is hard work — really hard work! Believe me, I know! I struggle with love the same as the next dude. That’s why it’s so important that we follow love back to its source and discover the One Who is Love. Only the God of Love can empower us and enable us to live a life of true love. When we are tempted to allow pride and arrogance to blind us from the very real needs and dignity of others, when we begin to slide down the slippery slope towards coarse behavior which taints our thinking and perverts a godly perspective on covenant, that’s when we need to fall on our knees and beg God to fill us with His strength and wisdom to seek His will in our love relationships.

My #1 priority in life is to honor my parents, my family, my friends, my loved one, my neighbors, my co-workers, and — ultimately — to honor the God Who created them. I can only do that when I lay down my pride, my boasting, my selfishness and greed, my desire for personal gain, my negative emotions, and seek out what is in THEIR best interest over mine.

The Bible says that “God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble.” Wow! Since I really dig grace, maybe I should check out this humility deal. It might be good for me!